Day 52: hit the ground running today. Lots of zipping around in the car. Had my shakes n vitamins. Way too cold to walk today.
Another dinner out! Had salmon broccoli n rice, and water. 1 tiny bite
of Joe's dessert (yum!) and some fruit w chocolate syrup. Which may have
been too much sugar. Or I may have had too much caffeine tonight. Or it
may be stress.
My shoulders are bugging me a bit. I've been
completely pain- free for weeks but tonight they are unhappy. And I am
disappointed. When I get home to nj, gonna do a cleanse day or 2.
Day 51: had my 2 shakes then decided to try some Splenda-sweetened chocolate. Big mistake.
Ew and p.u. (What does PU stand for anyway? I sure know what it means!)
I'm just glad I had those chocolates (only 2 of them btw) several hours
before the show. Yowza!
I've been eating such clean food I
can't get away with eating garbage anymore! It'll be easy to avoid
artificial sweeteners knowing the smallest amount means an afternoon of bathroom runs!
Speaking of garbage (haha), went to Waffle House after having a super
fun show tonight. One of my favorite parts of traveling and doing shows
is after-show meals with friends.
We made quite the spectacle
of ourselves, laughing, singing, etc. I'm eating low glycemic, so I had 2
eggs, 4 strips of bacon, and hashbrowns (hashbrowns are not that low
glycemic but they're also not pie- and not Splenda!!).
If I
did this every day it would be a major problem but I don't travel as
much as I used to (constantly, from 99-2001, 2003-2008). It can be a
challenge to eat well on the road.
The healthy plant-based
shakes and snacks keep me on track for 2 of 3 meals. It's that 3rd meal
where temptation can creep in. Generally I've done quite well with
eating on this trip. Just had to have 1 Waffle House meal while in the
land of Waffle House!
Tomorrow, back on track! No artificial sweeteners and no hashbrowns :)
Day
50: woke up tired yesterday but had lots to do so I relied on caffeine.
Which really meant I was borrowing from Thursday to get through
Wednesday..
I walked around town posting concert flyers today- for an hour! Kinda knocked me out.
Yesterday, I picked him up from his dialysis treatment, and he was very
weak and very quiet, occasionally making sounds that indicated to me
that he was uncomfortable and possibly in pain.
I tried to engage him in conversation but really didn't get anything back from him. I hadn't seen him in eight months, so I didn't know if this was the "new normal" or if this was a bad day.
I went over today with mom and their dog, Bu. Dad was having a little
nap with his head on the table in the sunroom but woke up when we got
there and was much more lucid today.
I was so relieved and
pleased to see that he was much more comfortable today and able to hold a
perfectly normal conversation. I said dad you seem like you're feeling
much better today. And he said yes I am.
I asked him about his
days in college and as I recently learned that he actually studied to be
an engineer, not a physicist. And that he went to Brown for one
semester. I never knew any of this. And that he taught himself
atmospheric physics after getting a PhD in solid state physics.
My dad 's been in a nursing home for two or three years now. He has
some form of dementia, which may or may not be Alzheimer's. He also has a
stoma in place of his bladder and has had more than one occurrence of
cancer, which has always been treated simply with surgery.
The
main thing I try to remember when I go to visit my dad is this: it's not
about me. If he doesn't remember me or doesn't feel like talking, I
don't take it personally. This is all about him right now. And I leave
myself, my needs my feelings my ego at the door. I try to be 100% there
for him. And that seems to make for the best visit.
Yesterday
after I realize he didn't feel like talking, I just drove him back to
the nursing home in silence. I could tell he just didn't have the energy
to force conversation.
Today he was in a good mood, so I
engaged in a conversation about stuff that would be in his long-term
memory, what college and studying physics – things like that. I also
showed him some funny pictures on my phone of my dog and some funny
things I had snapped off of the Internet. It was a nice visit, and
spending about 30 minutes with someone is all you really need to do.
If they are in a facility or hospital they don't have that much energy
and you don't want them to feel like they have to entertain you. In
fact, for a number of people, 30 minutes would be too much. Maybe just
10 minutes.
The point is this: leave yourself behind for a
brief time, Tune in to what their needs are, and do your best to be a
good friend/loved one.
If you have experience or advice that is
helpful in visiting a loved one who is chronically ill, terminally ill,
recovering from surgery or in the hospital for any amount of time,
please leave them in the comments below. I'm always looking to learn
more and share more about this topic: How to be a good visitor.
Day
46: had a fab fab fab time playing comedy concert at UU Aiken! Then got
back to my sister's house, hungry. After-show hungry, which can be
dangerous. Judgment impaired!
I did the impossible in one way: reached into a bag of Lay's and ate just one. Yeah- Just one!
Saw some cooked chicken in fridge, had a bunch of that and wasabi
popped snap peas. Not bad. A bit caloric and processed but not unforgivable.
My niece is having a birthday sleepover (bunch of 10-year-old girls),
and cake was on the counter calling to me. Of course I can't have cake
(gluten), but I did snarf about 1/2 teaspoon of frosting off the part of
the tray that no longer had cake on it.
Sadly, sugar still tastes fantastic. Wish I'd lose my taste for it altogether!
I have begun a series of homeopathic remedies (drops under tongue, 2x/day) in preparation for dental surgery.
I almost can't believe I'm volunteering for this, but I've decided to have elective dental surgery. And I don't mean cosmetic.
I've been saying for a long time that my health went south right after I
got my wisdom teeth extracted. I have a holistic dentist now, and he
was surprised at how confidently I said this.
It turns out that
these holes can close off as they heal, but leave a cavitation that can
fill with bacteria, resulting in a slow Constant drip of bacteria into
your bloodstream.
So, we are going to open up two of the four
sites where my teeth were removed, drill out any dead bone that might've
been left, put in a tiny piece of human bone and then my own bone will
go around it. It's not covered by dental insurance, I'm not looking
forward to it, but I feel very deeply that this is the right move for
me.
Proving once again- from high colonics to sticking onions
on my feet to signing up and paying out-of-pocket for a really
unpleasant dental procedure: I will do anything to be healthy.
So far so good. I feel so much better now than I have in years. I only
hope that this dental surgery move me forward and is not a setback. Wish
me the best! It won't happen for about another three weeks.
Meanwhile I will continue to build up my health and use the homeopathic remedies in preparation for the procedure.
